Thursday, September 08, 2005 4:11 PM - I jumped the gun... Current mood: nauseated Okay~I'm not quite as recovered as I thought. My nasal cavities swelled up quite a bit last night, and I had to take pain meds just to sleep. I've been spitting up chunks of bloody mucus-which is simply gross, but I can't blow my nose-sometimes they go down my throat and make me nauseated. I can't afford to be out of work anymore!! Arghhhh.My friend Marti (not the one on here!) just found out she has mono-great. I had that once after I taught school-guess I got it from being around all those teenagers. Lately I've been feeling very tired. I chalked it up to the surgery and whatnot. I bet you I got mono from her. The shitty thing is there's nothing you can do about it. Other than maybe get B-12 shots which may or may not help you. Can't I go for one month with no health-related problems?? Apparently not-welcome to becoming OLD.The site I mentioned in my last blog is called Wes' and Tom Cool Site: check it out here: Was and Tom's Cool Site (including The Letter Wars)Really. Check it out. It's very interesting. Also, my friend Tammy in Irag send me a cool site with pictures from a storm-chaser-these are great pics! That site is: Storm Chaser PicsAnyway, I have to go use some phenergan before I barf...take care all! 6:07 AM - I'm back.....sorta Current mood: relaxed Okay-got the splints out today-Holy Cow!! I never felt such relief in my life!! Those suckers were 2 1/2 inches long by and inch and half wide...I asked the doc for them and he said he had been doing this for 20 years and no one had ever asked for them until me. Welcome to me! No wonder I hurt unless I took drugs!! And I smelled for the first time in weeks...I was so thrilled to smell my own fart in the car!! Sorry, but it's true! I haven't been completely gone-just taking a break from running my mouth and taking more time to read other people's thoughts. I ran across this website called "Tom and Wes' Cool Site". I actually googled for sinus surgery and came across "Things from Wes' Nose"-which includes pictures. It's strangely comforting knowing other people out there have had big blobs of bloody mucus sucked out of their nose...The reason I bring this up is not about the mucus, though. It's actually a website/photolog/journal kept by a homosexual couple and it's very fascinating...it starts in 95, I believe, with Wes wanting to bring his new partner out to a family gathering, and the letters that go back and forth between him and other family members. He ends up putting them on the web, and a magazine eventually publishes them as well. It's a candid peek into a couple's life and what they deal with in regards to homophobia and AIDS. It's very compelling...definitely amusing and heartfelt. You should look it up..just google one of the phrases I mentioned earlier; I can't remember the "official" name.So I guess I'll leave Ebay alone for awhile as well. I found Ebay strangely entertaining when I was "high" on painkillers. I spent hours just looking at everything...I couldn't read in this condition because I couldn't focus well enough on pages..but I could hit computer keys. Don't worry-I only forked out 5 bucks on some animal skulls, turtle shells and fish scales for work~they came from a kid in MO who had picked these things up while fishing..also some thorns from a honey locust tree. This stuff is great to show kids. Oh, and I rewatched episodes of "MillenniuM". If you haven't watched this show-Rent it! Buy it! This show kicks ass! This is who we are.In my cyber travels I also figured out what those outfits worn by Middle Eastern women are called-the ones with a dress, pants, and a shawl. The dress/pants combo are "salwar kameez" and the scarf or shawl is called a "dupatta". I'm sorry-but I have loved this clothing and have wanted my friend in Iraq to get me some. Yeah-I would probably hate it if I was forced to wear it, but I'm not-so I like it! Anywho, you learn something new everyday!Anyway, now I've got to cope with reality again. It was almost fun in a sick way to have a break with "mood-enhancing" substances to consume. I think I used my time wisely...I "broadened" my mind.There-for all my friends that love to use pot...I took a "pot break" as well. Are ya happy??? (Edited to clarify that I did not use pot, but have had experiences similar in taking my meds!)I don't want to return to reality...reality sucks. I liked kicking back, high as a kite, cruisin' the net. Scary!! But I can breathe! Well, my sinuses are a bit swollen right now from pulling those damn railroad ties outta my nose..but it'll get better. Right?? HeheCan you believe a person actually put up old animal parts for auction of Ebay??? Better yet, can you believe someone would buy the shit?? Yep-that would be me. Seriously, folks-this does make great teaching material. Saturday, September 03, 2005 9:22 PM - Recovery is slowwww...... Current mood: awake It's been 4 days since my surgery. No more bleeding so I don't have to wear gauze under my nose. Which is good because the tape caused my face to get all red and peel! Yuck!The pain is not in my whole head anymore, but my nose is on fire, The splints inside that are supporting the septum they broke are rubbing against the inside of my nose and hurts like hell. I put some neosporin inside, and I'm still taking pain pills because I can't sleep. I'm very congested and the kicker is I'm not allowed to blow my nose so I keep sniffing constantly. Stuff keeps draining down my throat, so I have to use phernergan suppositories every one in a while to keep the nausea at bay. Isn't this just disgusting?? The whole situation is annoying as heck~I just hope the outcome is worth it. Oh yeah, the gums behind my front teeth are still numb, too. Feels weird. I can't taste any of my food, so it's actually pretty hard to eat because I don't really feel that hungry.I'm not sure if I'm going to the Reptile Show tomorrow since a) Gas has gone up so much and b) it feels kind of weird to go out and enjoy myself when so many people are suffering. I have watched some of the Katrina coverage for the first time today (hey, folks-I've been drugged!) and it's just shitty how it took so long to get some real help down there. Never trust the goverment to save your ass, cuz it ain't gonna happen. Reminded me that I need to replace my water supply here, as well as the canned food Shelby and I ate when things were tough. May sound crazy but I am going to do everything in my power to ensure self-reliance in the face of disaster. You see what happens if you can't help yourself. Having supplies won't guarantee my survival, but it sure will help my peace of mind. Maybe I should should tuck some of these painkillers away....then I won't give a F*** if I'm starving! I'll sure be happy! Hahaha-okay...one shouldn't laugh when so many people are in dire straits. But I'm not laughing at them, I'm laughing at me! Believe me, I'm a pretty hilarious sight right now.We're too far above sea level to flood to a great extent, aren't we? I mean, I know if we're near a water source like a river of lake we could flood like New Orleans. But could we flood in North Raleigh to that extent just from a hurricane? Yeah-I'm stupid-at least I admit not knowing that, and maybe someone out there could tell me.Good-my pills are kicking in...I was about to rip off my nose. Ahhhh-the power of hydrocodone. It it so bad to enjoy drugs this much?? Hahaha-see ya later.... Friday, September 02, 2005 8:09 AM - Where's Superman when you need him? Current mood: angry I find it extremely distressing that thousands of people are stuffed in the Astrodome hungry and even dying. The news says there aren't enough buses to move them out, etc., etc. Why can't school buses from surrounding states drive down and help?? I think a few days off school would be warranted in this situation, or parents could drive them to school. Let's not even get into the gas prices right now; people's lives are more important.If the majority of our National Guard was not overseas, they could be assisting Americans here, where they are needed. I think getting people out of that situation down South takes priority over everything right now. If that were my family, I would expect from my goverment better assistance and humanity that what they are receiving right now. Now I can truly see what to expect if such a calamity were to hit here. I'm glad I have an emergency kit put together with extra food and water. It may be nasty MRE granola bars and water in packets, but it's more than many people have right now, and it's only been reinforced to me that the government is ill prepeared to deal with large disasters and their aftermath.Of course, this is just my take on things, and I've been on pain meds for two days, but it doesn't take much to see that people are suffering and that more should have been done already~it shouldn't even have reached the point where dead bodies are lying around and people are being raped in the Superdome. Pathetic Americans. Thursday, September 01, 2005 2:58 PM - Update on Nose! :) Current mood: sore Okay-surgery went fine-not that I'd remember. All I know is I woke up and the very nice lady gave me lortab, phetanyl, and toradol. I was feeling good!! Then that night the pain started to come on. I woke up at least once an hour, and one time I had to lay down on the bathroom floor because I was very dizzy-reminescent of those shitty hangovers. Yesterday I went and had the packing taken out, and it felt like they pulled super-plus tampons out of my nostrils. Remember the scene in Total Recall where he pulls the tracking device out of his nose?? Yeah-that's what it felt and looked like. I had to wear gauze under my nose the first two days because blood and stuff kept running out, so now my cheeks are irritated and red from the tape. I still have the splints in my nose, which I didn't really notice until today. Now I feel like I have two pencils shoved up my nose, and I am congested, but I'm not allowed to blow my nose. I have to keep spraying saline nasal spray as often as possible, but it's all caked up inside with blood. You can even tell I have something in my nose because the bottom of my nostrils are kind of sticking up like a piglet's nose. Very attractive!I had to take two Loratab for the first day every 3 to 4 hours, because one wasn't enough-yeah-I'm a big baby! Also had to take phernergan because strong drugs make me barf. So I was pretty out of it. Was down to one pill, but this evening my nose is raw from the saline spray and I can't blow and it's driving me crazy and I just need the drugs to forget all of this crap!!My upper gums behind my front teeth are also numb, and the medication makes your mouth dry, so I've been sucking on Hall's Fruit Breezers and drinking loads of water. My boss and one of my co-workers brought over some dinner for me and Shelby Tues night and last night, which was way cool and such a nice thing to do. Shelby's been really good about helping out..it's just bad being around the house all day because I keep seeing things I can do, and the nurse told me on the phone that I need to lay down and not move around so much because that makes my heart rate increase which can lead to a greater loss of blood. But I think most of the bleeding has stopped by now. I sound really nasal when I talk-I hope that goes away...there's enough things I do that are annoying to people let alone sounding like Fran Drescher! I did get out today to put some gas in my car-wish I could have went out last night but I was too drugged up. Ge-sus!! $3.25 a gallon~at this rate I won't be able to afford to drive to work...and don't say ride a freakin bike because if I owned one I surely would! Damn republicans...I just read somewhere that affluent families spend about 4 percent of their income on transportation while poor families spend closer to 12 percent. Figures.And of course I feel for the victims of Katrina...I just haven't had much time to really think about anything since I've been in "Elmo's World" for the last two days. And now Shelby has a cold. When it rains in this house, it FLOODS! Hehe Okay, must go try to watch "Prison Break." I was too high to watch it the other night.Hope everyone is doing well....another update later! Would someone please blow their nose as a symbolic gesture for me?? Thank you.